Recency Bias Be Damned! Local Man's Favorite Color is Blue

Chesapeake, VA—In a very unexpected turn of events, today during an ice breaker for a Local Business’s Quarterly Meeting, Local Man Howard Smith bravely stated that his favorite color was and is blue!

“I mean right after he said it, you could hear a pin drop,” said Howard’s coworker Sharon Holt. “I know this because when he said it, I was so shocked that I physically dropped my pin and everyone heard it. Which was REALLY embarrassing.”

Many people are calling this a win for our first amendment rights. Jim down at the Mailroom had this to say. “I mean it was getting to a point where you could never talk about anything controversial in this office, but after that mad man Howard said his favorite color was blue, well now anything is on the table.”

Word of Howard’s heroics started spreading through alt-right, proud boy, Facebook groups faster than you can say chartreuse. With some of these groups even making Howard the face of their “cause”.

When asked about this, the hero himself had this to say, “All I said was that my favorite color was blue, I don’t know why this is taking off so much. I mean our company is embezzling millions of dollars from charities. Why is that not in the news?”

“Also I really do not stand with the Alt Right in any way, shape, or form. I’m a registered democrat; I’ve been that way for 30 years. Please do not use my likeness for hate.”

We also asked Howard if he would have done it differently in any way, were he able to go back and re-do it.

“No? I mean my favorite color is blue, why would I lie about that? Also, if you could actually not publish the stuff about my company embezzling money I can’t afford to lose my job.”

They say to never meet your heroes, but I sure am glad that I met Howard. Also Mr. Smith wanted me to add that if anyone is hiring, he currently is without work, and once again, is not Alt Right.

Meet the Writer!

MITCHELL AARON MULKEY (they/them)

is a comedian, writer, and actor based out of Chicago, Illinois and from Raleigh, North Carolina. Their written work can be seen in Robot Butt and End of the Bench Sports, as well as various sketches for the NC Based Comedy Collective Newt Work. You can see them around Chicago performing with their teams That Thing You Pull When You Want To Stop, and Jessie's Squirrel. They are in the works of producing their first full length play Basketball: On Stage: A Play.

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